Eye Contact 

Happy May Day everyone that uses the Gregorian calendar and everyone else too!

Really looking forward to my new book! One of my favourite subjects.

Good Morning, fellow mastonauts! (UTC +/- 5 hours or so 🤷‍♂️ zones only) or is it "fellow mastonaters" I'm not sure, go with what you prefer...

Look, if you've just arrived here, I'll give you some advice - do NOT look directly at the federated timeline for more than a few seconds...just don't...

People from twitter keep saying "where are the GIFs?" If you run Android and use the Google keyboard called Gboard in the Play store, it has a GIF option when you open the Emojis... If you use a Samsung or whatever keyboard it might have the same option. Check it out. 🤷‍♂️

"How do you like your coffee?"

"My coffee? I like it like I like my sexual partners - big, hot, and with a ..."


God, this cold is a nightmare. Despite Sterimar and nose spray before bed, OH kept prodding me awake as "I snored like a saxophone" and kept coughing. Terrible night's sleep. MORNING! In other news, I've almost perfected the riff from "Careless Whisper"...


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