#verybritishproblems
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Yesterday the children saw a video about #Muppets, how they're made, and animated. They wondered if we have any puppets, and the answer is: Yes.
Not a Muppet, but deep in a box of my old children's toys, we have Edd The Duck. Terrifying.
Thinking about that time my Australian wife (partner at the time, early days) left me a shopping list, and I ended up standing in the middle of my local supermarket what the fuck a zucchini or an eggplant is 
I needed a good laugh and this one never fails to crack me up!
To this day whenever I see the word "Waitrose" I hear it in my head in Christopher Ecclestone's voice.
#VeryBritishProblems #DoctorWho
Heavy work weekend over Easter, but managed to get away last night for my mate's mum's 70th birthday down the social club
There was one cask beer on (Young's Ordinary 
). I got charged £4.10 and my mate Dave, while stood next to me, got charged £4.50 by the same barman 
Anyway the beer was shite, so we switched to Guinness and got the fuck out of there
Articulated here by the culture section of The Independent, a surprisingly accurate take on something that has been frustrating me also of late.
Where are the voices from regular people in journalism, broadcasting and media in general? Disappearing further and further, while we stick heirs and heiresses on presenting and reporting duties.
The Independent · Made in Chelsea’s chokehold over British media is a depressing peek into our broken class system
#VeryBritishProblems
“Sorry, is anyone sitting here?”
Translation: Unless this thing on the seat next to you is actually a person who looks remarkably like a bag, I suggest you move it.
“Sorry, is anyone sitting here?”
Translation: Unless this thing on the seat next to you is actually a person who looks remarkably like a bag, I suggest you move it.
fedi.nlpagan.netAkkoma
I've just turned my phone on and will now spend the rest of the day hoping it doesn't ring.
#verybritishproblems
We're expecting a brief window of summer-like weather over the next few days. I hope you can get out and enjoy it.
Sigh... 
#weather
Finally got round to putting up my @verybritishproblems calendar
I love it. Bit peeved that I've missed out on 2 months of British idioms and behaviour - but it's up now. Better than previous years where calendars have never unwrapped 
Progress!
After a 5-year study, a multinational team of engineers, scientists, and mathematicians has determined the smallest measurable arc of a circle — it’s the distance between nipple-numbingly cold and scalding on a standard British shower valve.
Watching #VeryBritishProblems and realising that my upbringing was far more #British than it was #Jamaican. It explains why I spent a lot of my years in Jamaica being anxious because of internyal #cultureshock. How mad is it that I was experiencing culture shock in my own country?!
I hate #smalltalk - it's always awkward for me to do small talk, even as I understand that small talk is necessary for assimilation... and assimilation is required for people like me so we can literally disappear into the background and not draw extra attention to ourselves because we just don't like talking to strangers.
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@Whiskeyomega see, if ask did you mean : 'IS Christmas' that feels rude because, well you're a stranger. But if I just ignore your reply because I'm too embarrassed to ask - that also feels rude. #VeryBritishProblems ... 